I have not written a running post in a very long time, but I am looking for some accountability. I have a confession:
I have been trying to half-ass train for a marathon.
I should be shot.
I KNOW better. This is NOT my first rodeo. But here I am, skipping cross-training, eating fast food and sugar on a daily basis, carrying 9 extra pounds on my 5'7" frame. And trying to run 2 min/mile faster.
How's that working for me? It's NOT.
I am hating the training, when I loved it last time. And I am hating it because it is kicking my lazy butt. We ran 14 miles Saturday morning, and I got sick once (because I am not well-conditioned), and walked a lot (due to muscle cramps causing knee problems---lack of stretching). I actually have started feeling like, "Can I do this? Can I run 26.2 miles again?" And I've been thinking, 'I don't know.'
That is pathetic. It's like, once my injuries went away, so did the motivation. Now that it could be easier, I'm not pushing as hard. I can barely forgive myself for that. I am angry at myself. So it's time for a do-over.
Doing MyFitnessPal again. 9 pounds have got to go---first order of business. It's a fact: the skinnier you are, the easier running is on your joints. With the weight loss will automatically come "improved nutrition"---another big obstacle facing me.
Oh, and water? Maybe I should drink some? Caffeine and I have never been tighter. Iced coffee and iced tea have become my vices this summer. I don't think I can totally break up. I can only hope to cut down.
On the upside, I have been averaging about one soda a week. Down from 20? Well, there's an atta girl. Starting next week, I will be checking in, reporting weight loss, and reporting training activity. It's the only way I am going to survive this.
And by the way, this heat wave bites.